Molly Ate My Socks!

Slice of Life: Day 14

That very disinguishable smell was starting to creep up and I knew it was time for a diaper change.  Baby and I went upstairs and left my son in a trance on the couch.

Burp… ugh! There goes the left shoulder.  So much for keeping anything clean.  I lay her down, pull off her bottoms and unsnap her onesie to reveal we were on the verge of a blow out!  The soft pillowy dimples that coat the inside of the diaper were filled to capacity!

Then I hear it… the tears!  I run to the door to confirm as baby is gurgling and reaching for her toes… yep, tears!  I run back, grab baby, bulging diaper and all, and rush back downstairs.

“Luke, what’s wrong? What happened?”

There he is, tears filling his eyes and streaming down his face.  Face red hot.  What could have happened?!  He was laying on the couch watching Bob!

Through sobs, he blubbers out, “Molly ate my socks!”

“She did what?” As I ask, I look down to see two barefeet and a very guilty looking dog!  Socks nowhere to be found!

“What do you mean she ate them?!”

“She jumped up… (sniffle, sniffle)… pulled them off… (sniffle, sniffle)… and ate them.”  Cue more tears.

“Are you ok?  Did she hurt you?  Are your toes and feet ok?”

“No!”

“No?!  What’s wrong?”

“My feet are cold!” Cue full blown crying meltdown.

“I’m sorry Molly ate your socks.  That wasn’t very nice of her.  Would you like me to get your slippers for you?”

“Yea… ”

He sniffles.  Wipes his face with his sleeves and quizzically looks at me.

“Why isn’t baby dressed?”

Good question.

I cover him up with the blanket still dumbfounded that the socks were gone.  Literally gone!  Not just one, but both!  Now, my dog has been known to eat a stray sock or two that has been left on the floor or mistakenly dropped, but never has she pulled it off a foot, let alone two, and made it disappear so quickly.  I have no words.

Back upstairs to finally change the baby and change my clothes that are starting to have that other very distinguishable smell and get the slippers.

Clean baby.  Slippers located.  My turn.  I get in my comfiest PJ’s and take a breath. We’re all clean.  I pick up the baby pulling her close… bleh!

Direct shot off my chin and down my clean Downy fresh shirt where I feel it slowly pool before it seeps down further.  I stand there dumbfounded.  She’s smiling and wiggling while I hold her away from me to assess the damage.  This one’s going to call for another shirt… those cold feet will have to wait!

7 thoughts on “Molly Ate My Socks!

  1. I’m laughing and crying. That description of the diaper is priceless, and poor little guy w/ the cold feet. Did the dog pass the socks? One of my dogs ate a panty liner resulting in an $800.00 vet bill.

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  2. Oh my gosh… this is hysterical! Your bit by bit description pulled me right in and I was there with you! While I never had the dog eat my boys’ socks… all the other events… yes, yes and yes!

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  3. I love your description of round two … the slow pool before seeping down farther … and the most amazing part of it all is you come into work every morning as if you spent the night before at a spa. Don’t know how you do it; would love to have just one of your secrets on calm, patience and always a smile 🙂

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